The Story Behind Our Catholic Marriage Prayer

John and I hadn’t planned on writing a Catholic marriage prayer together. We wrote our prayer when we went on the Catholic Engaged Encounter retreat weekend. The entire weekend was very insightful. It helped us dive deeper and discuss important topics as we prepared for marriage – finances, family life, intimacy, etc. During one of the nights on the retreat, they put together a prayer service. That’s when we had the chance to write a prayer centering our relationship on God.

Honestly we didn’t have that much time to write but we took a moment to ask for the Holy Spirit’s guidance. The words we were inspired with became a prayer that we truly love and cherish. It reflects so much of our relationship in some really special ways. Shortly after, John printed it on prayer cards with an image of Jesus that we both love. We strive to pray it often and it constantly reminds us of how we want to consecrate our marriage to Jesus.

Behind the Prayer

“Dear Lord, we no longer want to live for ourselves but for you. We trust that you have a plan for our marriage and for our family.”

The first line in our prayer is actually inspired by the Youth Apostles community that John has committed to since college. That line is the first in the community’s prayer. We find it incredibly beautiful and reflects also our own desire to live out our vocation for God.

We thank you for all the grace that you have poured into our relationship.

It was by God’s grace that our relationship was possible. Leading up to our relationship, we had both been praying for clarity in our vocation even both considering some form of consecrated life. God gave us the grace to see each other in a new light leading us to date and eventually get engaged.

Help us to imitate your Son’s love for us on the cross – to each other, to our children, and to all those we encounter each day.

The purpose of our vocation is to be a light of Christ to the world through our marriage and family. Our marriage is ultimately not just for the two of us but for those who we encounter each and every day. This is primarily manifested in our love and care for our daughter Bella and any future children God blesses us with. However, it also includes our immediate family members, relatives, close friends, and co-workers. We wanted to pray for the grace to know how God is calling us to live out His love through our vocation in every way.

We ask that you help us remember the gift that we are to each other, most especially our friendship.

A key element of our relationship was our two-year friendship before we started dating. Our friendship is what strengthens us in our marriage which continues to be an important element even approaching our five year anniversary this May.

“What God has joined, man must not separate.”

The last line of our prayer – “What God has joined, man must not separate” – came from a moment when we were on a Spring Break trip together serving in the rural country of Kentucky. After a long day of work, we were spending time with our group and were paid a visit by the Missionaries of Charities who had been overseeing our work that week. One of the sisters came up to us asking how we met and how long we were dating. After responding that we met through our campus ministry program she recited this verse to us. It was a very simple and brief moment, but it caught us both off-guard because we had only been dating for a few months at that point. However, as time went on it confirmed something unspoken we had both felt – that God was the one who truly brought us together and if He called us to marriage, He would always be present.

Tips on writing your own Catholic Marriage Prayer

Here are some tips for how you can write and incorporate your own Catholic marriage prayer into your relationship! At the end of the day, it doesn’t have to be perfect, the most important thing is to offer your relationship to God and trust that He is working in it!

1. Set aside a date night that is dedicating to writing your prayer together. Incorporate time going to an Adoration chapel and writing ideas for words, verses, or elements that you’d each like to include in the prayer.
2. A possible structure for your prayer: 1) Start by praising and recognizing God in your lives 2) Give gratitude to God for how he has worked in your relationship 3) Ask God for the specific graces that you desire in your marriage together.
3. Consider any saint quotes or bible verses that are meaningful to you and your story. These were likely words that God put in your life to bless your relationship.
4. At the end, ask for the intercession of saints that you have a special devotion!
5. When you’re finished writing your prayer together, you can put together a very simple prayer service at home or a sacred space – purchase a candle to light as your say your prayer together for the first time.
6. Print your prayer or memorize it so that you can pray it together on your wedding day! You could plan to pray it together before the ceremony either during your first look or behind a door/wall if you’re choosing not to see each other before walking down the aisle. You could also save it for after you receive communion for your first prayer together as a married couple!

 

 

Interested in more tips and inspiration like this as you prepare for marriage? Click HERE for my FREE resource on “How to Plan your Catholic Wedding with Your Marriage in Mind”!